aka Leigh and Bloom versus the Entire Group By The End Gorrammit Why Do You All Suck So Much?

Leigh and I have been getting into some of the more serious five-man old-school content lately, and the increased need to not be a dumbass has begun to widen the gulf between good players and bad players. Good players thrive in this stuff. The tank holds aggro, the dps pound away and put up big numbers, the healer gets distracted by butterflies and barely manages to save everyone. That’s how it works, people.

But bad players stay bad, and start to look worse in comparison. We’ve had a few of them lately, including a duo of dastardly ninjas.

A Dire Maul East run found us with a death knight, a shaman, and a hunter. This was our first encounter with a death knight, and we were prepared to be amazed. Leigh readied her taunt for when he, in his Outland-level blue gear, would surely pull aggro. It … didn’t really turn out like that. The death knight did a whopping 150 dps (Leigh does about 350, good dps are rocking 400+, and the best mages are flirting with 700).

This was surprising, but not that big an issue. We can deal with low numbers, it just means longer fights. But the death knight took a turn for the funny when it was revealed that every time Leigh used her taunt macro, which shouts for enemies to get the fuck off her dps, the death knight thought she was yelling at him. He then began to cause troubles by having his ghoul pet on aggressive, which in a place as tightly packed as Dire Maul is a Bad Goddamn Idea.

We explained to him that he wasn’t being yelled at, then told him to put his pet on passive. He left the group. No one tells death knights what to do! I’m not going to post his name though, because his only real crime was ignorance and leaving the group.

After his departure, we were left with two other dps who seemed to be okay folk — Cleenex the shaman, from Alexstraza, and Caylana the hunter, from Spinebreaker. I’ve printed their names for a reason.

In the forested courtyard in Dire Maul East, destiny struck. Literally. We got the epic two-handed sword, Destiny, one of the original epic two-handers in the game. According to Thottbot this still auctions for 300 gold. Leigh and I, being civilized human beings, rolled greed. Both the shaman (who cannot equip swords) and the hunter (who would find the strength proc useless) rolled need. The shaman won.

Well, whatever, we thought. We were near the end, they were assholes, it’s not like we really need the money. But there was still the principle of the thing, so I informed them that this made them ninjas, and that they were lucky they had a nice tank and healer who would overlook this.

They both responded that they knew that this made them ninjas, and said that they wouldn’t normally have done it.

As Leigh then put it, “Oh, so you’ll only fuck over good tanks and healers?”

We then dropped group and stranded them. We know they didn’t finish the dungeon because when we requeued we got the hunter again for a fresh run, and made her leave the group because we refused to run with her. They’re both on our ignore list now. We hope they enjoy their longer queues. And I hope the shaman chokes on his gold.

Moral: I think we already went over this one. Don’t be a ninja. Unless you want to sit all alone counting your shiny loot when no one will play with you anymore. Being a gracious party member and rolling properly will not only help make you friends, it’s also totally good for your karma.